Mother kills her 3 mth old son for farmville??

As always here is the link to this disturbing and disgusting article. 

http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/a-22-year-old-mother-kills-her-infant-son-because-he-interrupted-her-farmville-game-on-facebook-2405009.html?fb_action_ids=10150871608554263%2C10150808379085947&fb_action_types=news.reads&fb_ref=type%3Aread%2Cuser%3AtyDgLwACTVdJcMOI6RMnjvMkATU%2Ctype%3Aread%2Cuser%3AVm5TgUL3FtG-t1LUTIa4Ej-oUzQ&fb_source=other_multiline&code=AQAg3NUuDKJZA-wn7gfNZWbTCX3pn0JM4YMV67ifAqpbfCrZXlexC4r3JmVN_1k_gkriEzd0twNve0eIOq6lV5D0RwPQxs0vaZEgm4YNvN3LUArZgZPXTNAGtA8OhQtEzXUn_MXS0cc8WvyYMRgf4z2l8ttLCKWExvaympkqi-8_vORi_WBx_c2iho6sS8cIHls#_=_

I cannot fathom the stupidity of this woman. When I read this article I became physically ill. Why do people get so wrapped up in bullshit games/fake realities to the point that they harm or neglect their actual life, their children, their responsibilities?

Playing those games will not better your actual life. They dont pay the bills. They dont feed or tend to your kids. They dont help your health and well being. They are not therapy and they are not any reason to do what that despicable woman did!

When I look at my daughter, even when I am really aggravated with her, my heart is filled with love, compassion, and an over whelming urge to tend to her. No matter what I am doing, what I am preoccupied with, or anything she comes first!! If shes crying Im not going to get pissed cause shes crying, I am going to find out what is wrong. Especially, when she was only three months old!! I mean come the fuck on!!! 

That little boy, Dylan, was only three months old!!! Instead of tending to his needs, she ignored him and ignored him. She waited till she couldnt stand his crying anymore and shook him. Then she smoked a cigarette and then shook him again and went back to her game. She said that he could have hit his head when she was shaking him. Um, ya think?

UGH!! Its just so disgusting!! 

That is your child! You were blessed to have that child! God blessed you with that child! Dont you know how many wonderful women out there cannot conceive?? If you didnt want him, if you were to preoccupied with that fucking pathetic excuse of a game, you should have given him up! At least then he could have went to a mother that would have loved him and cared for him. 

Kids arnt like pets people! You cant just have one and think well it will fend for itself. You cant even do that with a pet. 

Fuck farmville people! Take care of your damn kids! 

I think Im going to be sick. 

Comment below 

Happy Memorial Day!!

I have gone back and forth trying to write a blog for the last three days and stopped each and every time because of how pathetic I sounded. 

Today, I want to thank all those military men and women, past and present! Yall are amazing! I wish I was accepted to enlist but am proud to be called an American thanks to yall! You all sacrifice time, blood, sweat, and tears just to keep this land free and safe. I can be that a lot of you know someone who has given the biggest sacrifice defending our country. They laid down their lives for my freedom, for the freedom of my daughter, and for the freedom of every son and daughter out there. 

Although I dont get to speak to my brother that much and we have a very distant relationship I truly admire him. He has gone on many deployments and literally lives six-ten months in Iraq, Afghanistan, and lord knows where else, and the rest of the minimal time he gets to spend with his three amazing sons and wonderful wife. Which, really isnt much time at all. He misses birthdays, first steps, first words, athletic events, black eyes, and all those fun moments with his children that most other men take for granted with their own kids. He gets to see them through pictures, skype calls that are far and few in between, and gets to hear about the interesting things that they do. He stay strong and keeps working, keeps providing for his family, keeps striving to do the best he can. He is my hero and has been my hero since I was a little girl. I dont look up to make believe figures, politicians, or bullshit movie stars. They all pale in comparison to him and all of the things he does. I wish more than anything that I got to have the relationship that my sister or mother has with him. 

I was a selfish, jerk face child. He is 12 years older than me so, we just never connected on many levels. 

I pray for his safety every day and thank god that I get to call him my brother, even though I dont get to talk to him or see him. 

I hope you all take a moment and remember the true heroes this memorial day. God Bless them, keep them safe, and their families   strong. 

Correction, Sitter put child into washing machine

Okay, so apparently the sitter and her "male friend" put the little toddler into the washing machine that turned on and locked the poor little munchkin inside. Oh, yeah and almost killed the kid but its okay they didnt mean to put the child into danger so no charges are going to be pressed. 

EXCUSE ME!?!?! WTF??!!?? 

If that was my kid and I was paying some sitter to watch my child, and the sitters' "male friend" put her into a washing machine, trying to be cute or some bullshit I would want charges pressed! I would do more than want charges pressed. I would beat someone down! 

How dumb can you be? The sitter was responsible for the kid and she just let her dude friend put the kid into a washer, laughed, then freaked the fuck out when it started running. She shouldnt have her "friend" there with her while she is working for one, and for two how fucking dumb can you be???!!!! 

Enough about that, it makes me sick. 

School was alright today. Lots and lots of anatomy work. Yes, cosmetologists must know anatomy, physiology, and psychology. 

I am getting more and more stressed about moving. Money, packing, everything. I am just so stressed out. No help, no friends to turn to, and a whole bunch of bullshit keeps falling on my sholders. In then end it will all be worth it. 

As for everything else, well. SSDD

Parents put child in washing machine

I am absolutely fuming right now!!!! What the fuck is wrong with some people???? Here is the link. I warn you, it almost made me cry. Some people are so stupid. They are lucky he didnt die, and they should be punished for child endangerment. 

http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/worst-parent-week-dad-puts-toddler-washing-machine-183500809.html

Despicable! You dont put children in washing machines, that is common simple knowledge! Dont put children in washing machines! Dont hit childen in anger! Dont abuse children in any way! Dont neglect children! Dont molest children! Dont fuck up the beautiful blessing that is the innocence of children! Dont take imagination away from children! Dont forget that children are a blessing from GOD! They can be taken away as easily as they are given and they should be treated as the precious gifts that they are!! I will never understand why people who are such fuck ups are blessed with children, when there are so many fantastically brilliant and loving people out there that cannot have children. Its an injustice.  

Clean house equals to a happy me!

A clean house equals to a happy me! 

I have worked hard all darn day cleaning. I moved everything in the kitchen, mopped under and around everything, put down a bug barrier, washed the walls, did about three loads of dishes, organized the cabnets, wiped down the cabnets, remopped, washed the walls and baseboards in the the living room, took three bags of trash out, vacuumed, rearranged the furniture, fed the dogs, dusted everything, and did five loads of laundry. Yup. I am one proud woman right now. I know that doesnt compare to what some other women do on a daily basis but I am proud of what I have done and what I still have to do. 

I am trying to get everything seriously clean before I really start packing that way it will be easier for me to pack. I hate having to clean and pack. Its like having to do everything like four times before your even close to being done. 

Truthfully, I feel so much better after I am done cleaning. I think that I am a weak woman if I dont have a clean house. I am proud that my mother taught me how to fend for myself and clean at an early age because it means I know how to take care of myself long before other learn how to. Most people dont really learn how to keep a clean, proper house until they are in their late 20's/early 30's. Most of my friends still have no idea how to clean properly. 

Cleaning properly helps keep you and your children from getting sick, helps keep your dogs from keeping fleas, and keeps bugs away. I cannot stand bugs!!!! I guess I am slightly OCD about that but I cannot stand bugs. I cannot handle it. It freaks me out and I get really stressed. Now dont get me wrong I could get on Fear factor and not blink and eye but I cannot stand them being in my house. Just doesnt mix well. 

Whatever

I am in a very whatever kind of mood right now. I am so sick and fucking tired or dealing with people that are so selfish and inconsiderate. They make me want to fucking scream! I cant wait to get the fuck out of here but I have so much on my sholders and so much to pay for its really dragging me down. I was going to get on here and write about bullshit, try to grab some attention. But, fuck it. 

I dont matter to you or to anyone else. I am here for convience. I know that and I have lived with it for a very long time. 

Time for bed. Maybe I am just being cranky. 

Salon fair at school today!! !

So, today was Salon fair at school today. I was suppose to be doing "Through the Ages, the Rocking 70's" but my model ended up being sick so I thought I was going to have to drop out of the competition. Nope! My Campus manager seriously didnt want me to drop out so Jamie(a classmate/friend) and I did me up in Betty Page bangs and rockabillies fashion. Here are some pics-

It was last minute, we had to run to walmart to get the shirt and flower in my hair but I think that Jamie and I did a wonderful job . Comments below please! 

Mexico? No!

An article I read today scared the crap out of me. I dont think I will ever travel to Mexico. If I ever leave the country it will be to Canada, not Mexico.  

Apparently they found the bodies of 49 people scattered along the road side in between a city in Mexico and a city here in the states. The worst part of it all is that this isnt even the first incident with dismembered bodies being found like this. Apparently since 2006 when the Mexican president said he was going to start cracking down on drug cartels, 47,500 people have been killed, dismembered, and found in weird random ways like this. Most of these people cant even be identified because not only where their heads decapitated but their hands and feet were also dismembered. I knew that there was a reason I never went to Mexico on spring break or anything. It has never seemed safe to me. I have never actually been interested in even going. 

And I have been to Vietnam! I felt much safer there and I know there are far more reasons to be freaked out over there. 

I am not saying that Mexico is a bad place or anything, I am just saying that its not for me.

Anyway, lets talk about my life. LOL! 

Saturday I went out and actually had a wonderful time. I started out my night down on the Rivermarket, listened to some (impressively good) karaoke, shot a horrible round of pool, had my palm read (which ended up being so spot on it gave me chills), spent some time at the strip club, and then headed to the electric cowboy to dance it up with my friend Kita. 

I had a blast! 

Let me begin with my palm reading. I was just drawn into the shop. Like I had to go in and speak with her. Originally, I wasnt really going to get my palm read I was going to watch while she read someone elses and then decide but it was like my body just took over and made me leap ahead. She told me that she really liked my aura and then studied my palms for a bit. I didnt open my mouth, answer any questions, show her my phone, and I wasnt dressed in cloths I would normally wear. The things she told me from start to finish were so spot on and so right that it gave me chills. Only one other time in my life has that happened. I am not going to go indepth with what she said but she did tell me that I am on the right path, that my career change is headed in the right direction, and that although my heart is torn right now I need to continue to follow my heart because it will lead to great happiness. I think I might go back one or two times before I leave. 

Then I headed to Visions. Its a strip club and before you go all nuts on me, I find strip clubs empowering for women. She doesnt have to get up there and demean herself. She is being an artist. Yes, stripping can lead to other things that are demeaning and can ruin someones spirit but I think its beautiful. I could never get up there and be that powerful. To be that free with their body, Im to self conscious. Anyway, I am also bisexual and find great beauty in women. Every woman has an aspect to them that is absolutely gorgeous! There was one stripper that literally had me drooling. She was tall, dark hair, medium build, and absolutely beautiful. She had such strength and grace. I think every eye in that room stopped to watch her twirl. 

I had to leave after she got off stage though because it was like every one lit up their damn cigarettes. For those of you that dont know, I am allergic to cigarette smoke. Not the tobacco but all of the carsonogens inside of the cigarettes. My throat is still itchy and I had the worst migrain from it all Sunday morning. I got to talk to a very close friend, so I am not complaining. 

Then we headed to the club so I could dance and hang out with my friend Kita. It was a blasty blast! I love hanging out with her inside and outside of school. She has such a great personality and a light heart. 

Got home around 4 in the morning. Still managed to get up with my munchkin Sunday morning. Guess I havent lost my stamina as much as I thought I had. 

Mothers day was pretty normal. I spent it with Alyssa and received a whole bunch of messages from friends and family wishing me their best and vice versa. And as usual I was celebrating the day as if I was a single parent. Infact, not once did he tell me happy mothers day or say that he appreciated anything that I do or have done. Ill admit I wasnt really surprised  but I was very awestruck at who actually did wish me a happy mothers day. He didnt have to, they didnt owe it to me, and shes not theirs but they still told me how much they appreciate me and wish me well within the next year. 

Makes me think about a few things. 

Obama backs gay marriage

Personally I just think its marriage. You dont call shopping, gay shopping just because homosexuals shop too. Honestly, look at our divorce rate. And, that is straight people fucking up the whole system. 

You cannot control who you fall in love with and seriously this shouldnt even be a huge issue. It really pisses me off the more and more news is spread about it. Let the people of the free world love the people that they love and marry whom ever they want to marry. Its their choice and all this fighting about the issue is just spreading hate. 

I was going to vote for Obama again because I believe he has done a top notch job with all of the crap that he was left from bush and this just further my resolve to vote for him again. He is a well educated man, strong in his convictions, has done basically everything he has promised to do, and brought us out of a horrible recession. Yup, 2nd term is in his future.

The next thing I want to discuss is a rather somber subject. Vidal Sassoon passed away today. He was such an inspiration and  was such a wonderful, artistic, and forward thinking hair stylist. I think that without him women would still be stuck in the dryer ages with hair. Alot of my fellow classmates are going to be devastated tomorrow. 

Other than that, school is going alright. I had a wonderful talk with a student that is graduating on Friday because honestly all those gossiping bitches are getting me down. I dont want to stoop to their level and I dont want to dislike school because they are there. Its horrible. He gave me some great advice though. He told me that no matter what strive to keep my upbeat, optimistic personality and outlook on life. In the end it will all be worth it and the people that are constantly hating on others are really just hating on themselves. Life is more important than all of this petty bullshit. So, needless to say I left the conversation feeling rather good about myself and my journey. 

On other news I reconnected with two old friends and cannot stop smiling. One of them seriously has my heart and is always there when I need them. The other was with me through a rough patch and shares alot in common with me. Both are amazing and both have special places in my heart and in my memories. 

Comedy Awards

First off, I absolutely love Robin Williams! He is rocking that beard. Secondly I would absolutely die laughing if I was there. So many talented comedians in one room, with no censor....I would die of laughter. I am still catching my breath right now from laughing so hard. 

I always dreamed of being a comedian but it takes alot to really open up like that, have no censor, and be so free spirited. I love Comedians! 

Who is your favorite comedian?

tgif -ISH

TGIF-ISH!

Yesterday I had an exam that I failed by 5 points and then a practical exam that I aced. It was a long day at school. I was very shocked with myself during my exam. I knew all of the answers I just spaced when I actually took the exam. Which means I have to take the test over again in two weeks. So, I have two weeks to study for three subjects. I can do it. 

What was not so TGIF was when I went to pick up Alyssa from school. She fell off of the playgound equipment during her recess, busted her lip, and had a bloody nose but I did not receive a phone call. I was so pissed. A bloody nose always requires a phone call! Its actually a law. She could have broke her nose, it could have severed into her brain, she could have had a concusion, and I should have received a damn phone call and even if I dont answer because I am in school from 8-5, LEAVE A DAMN MESSAGE!

Now I have to go pay bills and run arrons. 

Freaking Daisy cutters man...

Just when I start to get excited about something. 

Freaking daisy cutters man. 

So, I am trying to cross country rent a house and have everything moving, going, ready before I am actually down in Florida and I keep getting smacked in the face with bullshit negativity and doubt. 

I have so much I want to write and the over whelming urge to censor myself which really sucks balls. I am so stressed out, pissed off, and disgusted its overwhelming. 

I cannot stand bugs. I cannot live in a messy house and every single day its a mess. I use to come home and go straight to cleaning but I am so overwhelmed at this point that I have no will power to do it. I take Alyssa and go hide in our room. we go to bed early, leave early in the morning, and I normally take my sweet time getting home in the afternoon because I know what I will be coming home to and it really depresses me. I have to be the one to do everything, I get the guilt treatment if anyone else does anything, and I am so sick and freaking tired of it. I cannot wait to move and get away from all of this. I know my problems will follow me but at least I will get at least a small break. I want my own house again. I want my own furnature again. I want to know that I can leave the dog food bag slightly open and not have to worry about bugs getting into it. I dream of cleaning my own house and not have to worry about moving something out of order, throwing something away because it has some bullshit sentimental memory connected to it. Im just worn thin and this weekend I am going to have to clean from Friday to Sunday and then run arrons all Monday and back in the salon Tuesday. No break. No rest day. No calm down moment. Please god let me be strong enough to make it till July. 

Tanning booth mom really?

First and foremost here is the address to the story. Click it, watch it, then return here. 

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/tanning-booth-mom-says-arrest-taking-daughter-5-153138630.html

OMG!!!!!! She may or may not have taken her child to the tanning salon with her. I cannot pretend to know but she obviously likes to tan at least once every thirty minutes. 

How can she look in the mirror and not see that she has a massive problem? She is darker than some of my black friends. Her skin literally looked like leather. That cannot be healthy and I bet that she already has some form of skin cancer. It is absolutely ridiculous. She is teaching her daughter that its okay to tan in excess. Her daughter is fine skinned, red haired, and burns easily. If she goes tanning starting at 16 or earlier, she could most deffinately have skin cancer by her early 20's. One harsh burn is enough to raise your chances of having skin cancer so significantly  its scary. 

According to Skincancer.org tanning bed tanners are 74 percent more likely to develop melanoma than non tanners. 

And 40 to 50 percent of Americans that live to 65 will have either type of skin cancer at least once. 

I have used a tanning bed only three times before, once when I was 16 before I knew any better but I was completely scared to death because the damn thing closed and wouldnt open, then I tried it again in a standing tanning bed when I was 18, and right after I had Alyssa two years ago. I knew the last two times that I used the tanning bed that I shouldnt have but I also refuse to use those self tanners. Im sorry but using that much product all over your skin cannot be safe either. Its like paint. Paint all over the body for long periods of time isnt healthy. Its deprivation of oxygen. 

I would much prefer to use my sunblock and live a longer healthier life. Yes, I still tan while I am working outside in my yard. Sunblock doesnt block 100% but I will at least try to save my skin to the point in which I can. I slather lotion and sunblock on Alyssa every time we go to the park, are outside for a long period of time, and deffinately at the beach. 

That mom is just being an idiot. 

Enough about that it just makes me sick. 

School was alright today but it really aggravates me how some of those girls can be. I take pride in my work, I am not afraid to ask questions of the teacher, and I take notes so they talk shit about me. Haters. I was unaware of the fact that I was in junior high. I thought I was in college. 

We were doing a round of review but our educator was trying to make it interesting so she turned it into a review game. One side of the room against the other. I was asked to take score because Ms. Tammy knew I would know the answers and that I study. Well, I wrote on the board team 1, team 2, and Ms. Tammy. Meaning that if Ms. Tammy won then the teams would go with the obvious conclusion that they needed to study some more before our exam on Friday. Instead of taking that as a logical thing the girls on team one started talking shit about me saying I was making rules and shit. FUCK THEM! I stayed quiet at first because I didnt want to play into the petty bullshit, then Kita (one of my best and only friends at school) started getting pissed off because what they were starting to say wasnt petty bs anymore. It was personal and uncalled for. Thats when I stepped up with my loud ass voice and shut them the hell up. I have no doubt that tomorrow they are still going to be talking shit because they are haters. However, I am not going to entertain such bullshit drama. I am not a child. I refuse to act like a child. I have a child. Its pathetic. 

I cannot wait to transfer. Hopefully I will have a better group of people to deal with. 

Not much better when I got home. So much cleaning, packing, and cleaning to do.