This week I have learned many things and reflected much on myself and my choices. The truth is I have made so many mistakes and chose the wrong people so many times. I have also been more forgiving than I should have and I've trusted the wrong ones with my heart. I know I hold some double standards because I am a woman and guess what some times we are a tad bit irrational. However, no I won't go into that tirade because there is no excuse. I fucked up. I trusted someone I thought I could and turns out I couldnt. I should have said things I didn't and I lost what I thought was my future. No one is my future besides my daughter, myself, and the goals I have for my little family. If there are people that don't want to be in my life they can leave. Regardless of how many times I allowed them back in mine, forgave, accepted, and tried. I cannot change what I've done, who I love, who I cannot love, who I feel trapped by, and why I feel so alone in a crowded room. It's probably because of those same people that I trusted and found out I couldnt. I know my mistakes. I know my flaws. I'm upfront about them. Ugh I feel like I'm just going in circles of how shitty I am. Enough!
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