I hate that feeling you get when you seriously feel like you have to cry but physically cant. I was starting to feel better after
talking to some wonderful friends, that thank god are better than I am. They are willing to come back into my life and stay, they never gave up on me, and they are (as I said) wonderful.
Then with two words, I get torn back down. I cannot wait to get out of this hell.
Ya know what, I have never been this open with anyone or anything. I can't open up to people. Listening and being other peoples confidont, that I can do. Everything else, for get it. I fear being open with people. No one can ever know what is really going on in my mind.
For a while my blog on myspace was really open and honest but then myspace became lame and swarming with viruses. I cant even log in to save my old posts, and I had some wonderful poems on there. Oh well, my creativity never sleeps, which is probably why I am insomniatic person who normally wakes up really early in the morning. With random weird thoughts.
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